Worth It
Predictable and easy are not words anyone would use to describe foster parenting. Yet, in the midst of the difficulty, the heartbreak, and the unknown, beautiful families are formed. That’s how the Leidenheimer family of four became a family six.
When Liam and Jack came to live in their home, Brandon and Clare Leidenheimer didn’t know what the future held. They only knew they already loved these two boys and would do their best to protect them. So, day in and day out, that’s what they did. This was especially tough when dealing with the court system and the turnover in workers assigned to their case. “Having no say in decisions or the final outcome when we’re the ones loving and advocating for them daily was the most challenging aspect of our experience,” they explain.
Eventually, the boys became available to adopt. The family had loved them so well and for so long already, the choice was easy. Liam had been in their care for 1,473 days and Jack for 1,374 days when they were adopted, becoming part of the Leidenheimer family forever.
Once the boys were officially their sons, they were faced with a difficult decision. While it’s often best to help a foster or adopted child maintain relationships with biological family, there are also situations when the risk of more harm and continued trauma is just too great. “Healthy boundaries have to be set,” the Leidenheimers share, “and maintained relationships are not always in the best interest of the child and/or adoptive family.”
The joy and laughter the boys bring the family are the most rewarding part of their journey. As tough as the challenges were, every moment of feeling powerless in court and struggling to navigate a difficult path with the bio family fade in comparison. “It can be a test of your faith, relationships, and mental health sometimes,” the couple says, “but the joy that the kids bring to our lives makes it all worth it.”